Teens, social media and social anxiety

The honest answer is: we don’t know for sure, and the evidence so far does not show that social media causes social anxiety. Anxiety symptoms in teenagers have gone up in several countries, especially in girls. But studies that follow the same teenagers over years have not found that more social media use leads to more anxiety later. What is clearer is that socially anxious teens are more likely to use social media in ways that cause problems.

Is social anxiety really rising?

Some data say yes, at least for symptoms.

• In Finland, a survey of about 450,000 young people aged 13 to 20 found that the share with high social anxiety scores doubled between 2013–15 and 2021. In 2021, 47% of girls scored above the cut-off.
• A review of teenagers across many countries found that anxiety, distress and self-harm are rising, most of all in girls.
• During the COVID-19 pandemic, a study that combined 29 studies found that about 1 in 5 young people had high anxiety symptoms, roughly double the earlier estimates.

Two cautions. First, these are scores on questionnaires, not diagnoses. A high score means “worth checking”, not “has the disorder”. Second, the oft-quoted claim that 36% of young people have social anxiety comes from an online survey with a screening cut-off. It is not the same as 1 in 3 having the disorder.

Does social media cause it?

This is the heart of a loud public debate. The psychologist Jonathan Haidt argues in his book The Anxious Generation that phone-based childhood has driven the rise in teen anxiety. Other researchers, such as Candice Odgers, argue the science does not support that claim.

What the stronger studies show:

• Following the same teens over time. In Norway, a study followed 810 young people from age 10 to 16, with anxiety checked by interview. When a teen used social media more than usual, it did not predict more anxiety later. More anxiety did not predict more social media use either.
• No link to lockdown time at home. In the Finnish survey, the rise in social anxiety was not linked to how much time pupils spent in distance learning.
• Problematic use goes with social anxiety. A study that combined 53 studies found a strong link between social anxiety and problematic social media use: use that feels out of control or gets in the way of life. A link like this can’t show which comes first. One possible explanation is that anxious teens turn to screens as a safer way to connect.

So for a socially anxious teen, social media is less likely to be the cause and more likely to be part of how they cope.

When social media helps and when it hurts

It can help when your teen:

• keeps in touch with real friends between meetings;
• finds others who share their interests;
• uses it as a step towards meeting people, not instead of meeting them.

It may be a problem when your teen:

• uses it to avoid all face-to-face contact;
• spends hours comparing themselves with others and feels worse after;
• checks constantly for reactions to posts and is upset by silence;
• stays up late online and loses sleep;
• is being bullied online.

What parents can do

• Ask, don’t accuse. “What do you like about it? Does anything online make you feel worse?” works better than a ban.
• Focus on what is being missed. If screens are replacing school, friends or sleep, deal with that directly.
• Agree on a few clear limits together, such as phones out of bedrooms at night.
• Use it as a bridge. An online friend from a game or club could become a meet-up later.
• Watch for bullying. Ask about it, and know how to report it on the apps your teen uses.

Taking the phone away is unlikely to fix social anxiety by itself, because the fear is about people, not screens. If your teen’s fear is stopping them from going to school, seeing friends or doing things they want to, see therapy for children and teens. If they seem very low or talk about hurting themselves, see crisis lines.